I'm thinking about joining a choir. Not sure I am up for the obligation maybe closer to fall. I just know singing makes me happy.

Another great day.
So last night Aaron or at some point Aaron emailed me calling me evil and such and telling me he was sorry I wasn't over him. What a riot! I certainly corrected that line of thinking. Just because I called him on his shit. Too funny. So then I became one of his persecutors, in spite of the fact that I wrote him character references, gave him safe haven when voices abounded, etc. So when that didn't get to me he called me a man hater. Too funny. As I explained to him that I have a good life, great friends, hobbies - poetry - actually getting into it again, gardening, reading, etc. and that all I did was point out the obvious that he didn't agree with so kept throwing things at me that don't apply to me. Men hater - Absurd!

Looking forward to this summer. Have a P-Patch fling here this Saturday late evening/early night. And another gathering for the secretary's union late June, and another --thinking BBQ for both of those night of friends who have been traveling, Prague, Rome, Budapest, Mexico, so I can live vicariously through them!

And yes now I have my birth certificate so I can get my passport. Am plugging away at my debt and soon will be able to plan my own adventure. Soon is relative...not a a decade away, but not that close either.

Isn't it nice how weeding ones life actually invites celebration in to it... I love it!

Great weekend so far, water aerobics and swimming yesterday. The garden oh wait Aaron was going to help me with the garden and started telling me about his date last night. Then he tells me he isn't attracted to her (told him she was a BBW but she is too big for him he says....what's new, right?)but is going to go out with her a few more times because she is fun. I told him that was manipulating her, because she already called him this morning so is interested in him. He said I couldnt' know that I told him I was speaking from personal experience. After all if he hadn't told me how beautiful I was when we started dating to over a year and half later telling me he wasn't attracted to me I would never had invested that time!!! So he started telling me I was an asshole and to turn around and drop him off because he didn't want to spend the day with an asshole...so yup I turned around and dropped him off he told me again as he was getting out that I was an asshole, and I told him he was too. He talks about how honest he is, but clearly can't see the deception it is fun for him so forget that she gets invested because he wants to have fun.... seriously screwed up!
Anyway I got the tomatoes in and put up a new wooden pea trellis because vandals kept destroying the one I made. I forgot the plastic for the cloist/cloche no idea how to spell that, but have to go back and weed the other plot. Only doing bits at a time as I don't want to mess up my back this year. Hopefully not to cold or rainy tonight so the tomatoes will be ok! Feels good to dig in the dirt and pull out the weeds in all areas of my life!!!

Trying to live again. Going to a musical revue of the 60s and 70s tonight, should be fun.

FRAUDFRAUDFRAUDFRAUDFRAUDFRAUD
STUPIDSTUPIDSTUPIDSTUPIDSTUPID
SUCKERSUCKERSUCKERSUCKERSUCKER

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tonight's poetry reading a self published poet
whose poems were featured with angels, little black
dresses, moon, goddess, crone, and fuck... I think I have blocked out the other cliches...
and yes she gave her card to another writer to help her
publish...

okay....

mediocrity is the what we are leaving to our children!